Living My Best Life?
Does it hurt? Is it uncomfortable? Is it challenging the “truth” that you had built so much on?
If you answer YES, then don’t resist it. Feel it. Breathe into it.
Many years ago, I was on the phone crying to my mom about something that was happening in my life, her response was, “Cle, you are experiencing growing pains. It doesn’t feel good but you will get through it”. I didn’t quite understand it then, but I definitely get it now, as I’ve gone through yet another “growth spurt” - spiritually and mentally.
Over the last two-plus years, I’ve been immersed in counseling - like big TIME. LOL. This is not my first time in therapy, I was introduced to it in Undergrad and found it to be extremely beneficial. Nonetheless, there were a few things happening in my life in 2018 + 2019 that really prompted me to incorporate therapy into my life again:
This was around the time that Cardi B had dropped the song “Best Life” with lyrics like:
I told y'all, I said I'm livin' my best life
I told y'all, I said I'm livin' my best life (ayy)
I made a couple M's with my best friends
Turned all my L's into lessons
I really liked that song but when I sang it, I would question myself - are you really living your best life?
2. A relationship that I valued had just come to an abrupt end. Shout out to dude, I appreciate you, more than you know.
I knew in order for me to get to my next, I KNEW I needed to do some work; picking apart some patterns, identifying the beliefs that were keeping me in the loop, and laying a new foundation. So I got to it.
Therapy sessions every two weeks. Religiously and intentionally exploring things that I knew about myself and uncovering things that I was not aware of. I would set up my sessions for 6 PM on Thursday evenings so I could go right home afterward, able to process the new learnings alone.
Some of the things that I learned were painful - not because someone had done something to me as a child or I had some unfortunate dark past - but because of the reality that over the years of working, pushing, and making things happen, I had become so disconnected from myself, my God-self, my intuition. I was learning a new me. I was evolving. And with becoming, there was pain, that I didn’t want to resist any longer, but lean into. It is said that when we discover new things about ourselves – either positive or negative – it can often feel a little bit uncomfortable. The person we knew ourselves to be is now expanded, and we have to do some mental adjustments to accommodate this newly expanded view of ourselves. That is what is meant by psychological growing pains.
I encourage you to pay attention to your world, and your life. Ask yourself, am I living my best life? If the answer is yes, good for you. If not, I encourage you to identify what you need to do to create that life.
Trust me when I say more for you is possible.
God’s got you!